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  • Leslie Palumbo, LCSW

10 ways to de-stress

Updated: Apr 14

Raising our vibration is a less dramatic process than you think: it happens one small step at a time.

Here are 10 ways to de-stress, or raise your vibration to a more positive state of mind:

1. Take deep breaths.

Taking deep breaths activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which is our relaxation response. Making the exhale longer than the inhale amplifies this response even further.

2. Connect with the sensations in the body.

Even a brief check in or inner body meditation that connects you with the physical and energetic sensations in the body lowers stress and tension. Simply sit still and take notice of each area of the body. When thoughts arise, allow them to be there but continue to return the bulk of your awareness to what sensations are taking place in the body in this moment. The body responds palpably and positively to your attention to it.

3. Disrupt or distract yourself .

Movement is change. Getting up and moving changes our physical, mental, and emotional state. Even small movement dispels the physical effects of strong emotions in the body.

4. Appreciate something about this moment, or day.

Gratitude is the portal to abundance. Studies show that gratitude changes your neural pathways. Finding even the smallest thing to be thankful for opens up the possibility for a more positive state of being.

5. Remind yourself of the very best parts of you.

Remember that in the eyes of the universe, you are always magnificent. As a human being, happiness is your birthright. You were born with the capacity for great happiness, and no experience, no matter how painful, can rob you of that right. You also came in with certain essential strengths and gifts, and these have shown themselves at better moments in your life. Recalling moments when these parts of you shined has great power in lifting you toward your true essence. If it helps, find a photo or a visual or tactile reminder of these inherent gifts to connect with.

6. Hold onto a greater vision for how you want to feel.

Dream big about what you want for yourself and how you want to come through this time. Be specific about how you want to feel. Imagine you are that future self. What advice would you give your present self to help you move through this?

7. Connect with other people.

Being the only voice inside your head is never a good thing. Let other people in, or at least share some time with them. It introduces change into what may feel like a static situation.

8. Laugh.

Don't take it all too seriously. There is always something funny or ridiculous to be found. Remember a hilarious time in your life, or watch your favorite scene from a funny movie.

9. Have faith.

Have faith that this situation or these feelings won't last forever. Feelings aren't facts, they are temporary way stations on life journey. You don't have to see a better time ahead to have it be arriving. As Martin Luther King said, "Take the first step in faith. You don't have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step".

10. Offer yourself lovingkindness.

Imagine you are a mother swaddling and cradling her infant in her loving arms. You are the infant. Offer those feelings, that deep loving care, to the most scared parts of you.


Victor Frankl said, "there is one thing that no-one can take away from you; that is how you choose to think and how to respond". It's the action on our part that causes the universe to respond. We may not have a choice about what life hands us, but we do get a choice in how we respond and what we make out of it. It is not so much about what happens in life but about how you respond to it that leads to happiness. It can be empowering to remember this in times of stress.

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© 2020 Leslie Palumbo, LSCW

Leslie Palumbo, LCSW

Madison, CT 06443

203-640-8349

leslie@lesliepalumbo.com